Post by KittyLane on Jan 30, 2007 0:42:00 GMT -5
Coming Out: Christian Paganism
Author: H. E. Smith
Posted: January 24th. 2004
Times Viewed: 6,438
I am Christian Pagan. While the two faiths seem opposed, this isn't necessarily the case. Both religions are general groups that include many subsects. Baptists aren't the only Christians out there, nor are Wiccans the only Pagans. Historically, Christians and Pagans have been at such odds that it creates the illusion of fundamental contradiction.
I used to believe that illusion myself. I was raised by a semi-conservative family; they ranged between liberalism and conservatism, depending on which books my father was reading at the time. When I was a teenager, my psychic talents started to blossom. I could sense psychic energy, accurately distinguish past happenings from some objects, and I had some precognition.
About this time, things started happening around my household. My parents went through a rough time in their marriage, and it had a negative effect on the energy. I was depressed and throwing myself into religion, even though I didn't go to a church. My father was reading Fundamentalist Christian books at that time, books like He Came To Set the Captives Free by Rebecca Brown and other books on "spiritual warfare."
These books encouraged a misconception that many Christians share -- that all Pagans worship Satan, even if they don't realize it. They went further, accusing Pagans of being demon-possessed, and warned that if a Christian had anything to do with a Pagan without conversion, they could be possessed as well. Scare tactics.
Prior to reading those books, I had no problems with Pagans. I didn't think they were evil; I just thought they were different. A couple of years earlier, I'd read Mercedes Lackey's Diana Tregarde novels and had the premonition that I would marry a Wiccan man, though I discarded that possibility as ridiculous.
After reading the Fundie books, I got scared. I hate to admit that I believed them. I was desperately searching for an explanation for the things that were going wrong in my life. One year, I had eleven cats either run away or die. I dreamed the deaths of five of them. Things would routinely disappear around the house without explanation. For example, one day my father put down a coffee bag on a breadboard. He turned around to talk to me. We both looked back to the breadboard. No coffee. We looked on the floor, in the cupboards, in the freezer, in the garage, in the pantry...everywhere it could possibly be. Still no coffee. Five minutes after giving up, the coffee reappeared on the breadboard. Those books described this as common behavior in households with demons.
Also, at the time, my mother was under extreme stress from the situation with my father. Her actions were so out-of-character for her that I latched onto demon possession as an explanation.
Even then, I didn't totally believe everything the books said. I had a hard time believing that rock music would open someone to demon possession. I also had difficulty believing that all Pagans were possessed. What got to me was -- "What if it's true?" I was scared into it and avoided having anything to do with Pagans, though I was polite enough not to preach.
I lost my mind and came back from it. This is important. If you know someone who gets brainwashed -- don't give up on them. They can come back, but it may take time.
When I was seventeen, I joined an online writer's group and started going to their chat room. After a while, I started talking about religion with one of the guys there, and I remember thinking that he was the most Christian man I'd ever met, in the sense of the way he acted towards others. We agreed on everything we discussed, which surprised me, because this had never happened before. A couple weeks later, he mentioned he was Wiccan.
This freaked me out. I was terrified because of the things I'd read, but this man was nothing like what the books portrayed Pagans as. I prayed and asked God what I should do. I still remember the response: "I brought you here for a reason. Don't be afraid."
Over that summer, I started questioning a lot of what those books said. I did some research online and found The Celtic Connection's great FAQ on Wicca. My jaw dropped when I read it. Nearly everything talked about in that FAQ described my beliefs.
That's when I started questioning my faith, when I started seriously looking at my beliefs. If something didn't make sense, it went out the window. A religion isn't worth following if it doesn't hold up to scrutiny. After thought, I realized that I believed in reincarnation, multiple gods, and that my moral code ran closer to Wiccan/Pagan than conservative Christian.
But none of those beliefs were against Christianity in any way. What Christ said about Heaven in the Gospels could be interpreted as reincarnation. Also, in the Ten Commandments, God says, "Thou shalt not worship any God above me," not "You shall not worship any God but me." It simply means that if you worship that God, you should at least worship him on an equal level with your other gods. On the moral code, many liberal Christians have morals and ethics closer to Paganism than conservative Christianity.
I went through a phase where I called myself "Eclectic Christian" and told people I had Christian, Buddhist, Native American, and Pagan beliefs -- which I did. But I still feared to fully embrace my beliefs. I lived in my parents' house, and I knew if they found out about my beliefs, they wouldn't stop pressuring me. I was underage, and they in effect owned me.
It wasn't until after I left home and moved in with my fiancé -- hilariously enough, the Wiccan man who'd first opened my mind -- that I felt free enough to fully explore my beliefs. One of my housemates is "Pagan with Christ as patron," as he's put it. He is the first other Christian I've met that I agree with when it comes to religion.
Christianity and Paganism are not mutually exclusive. Whether or not Christ was originally a god, that same question applies to many other gods. For example, Odin from the Norse and Quetzalcoatl from the Aztec. That does not make Christ's teachings invalid or him any less a god to those who worship him. I do not believe that you have to accept Christ as Savior in order to be Christian. He never said anything about that; Paul and others after him did. Christ said: "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." (John 14:6, NIV.)
In context, Christ seemed to be talking about actions and the way you treated people, not spiritual codependence. People should be responsible for their own actions, not asking the Divine to take on the role of rescuer while they play victim. However, one Christian told me that I couldn't call myself a Christian because I didn't accept Christ as Savior. I've had others say the same because I didn't agree with their church's dogmas. I believe that the Bible is meant to be interpreted on a person-by-person basis, prayed and meditated on, thought about. Not listening to the Weekly Hatemonger Show on the radio or going to see it live at your local Fundamentalist church and accepting their views as given straight from God. The world is bigger than that.
As time passed, I became more comfortable with my beliefs. One day, when I was walking down the road to the local Tom Thumb, I was meditating on the gods, and I realized that Bast was Goddess to me. I'd said that I honored all the gods and respected them, but never worshipped any other but Christ. But Bast...I had always been fascinated with Bast. I read about her and wrote about her. I never dared worship her before. But she has clearly blessed me; during the years when I was having so much trouble with my family, my cat Owl basically raised me. She was my mamacat.
Also, Bast made her blessing known in a very real way during my handfasting. It took place in the living room because weather did not permit an outdoor event like we'd planned. After she was summoned, everyone could hear the "jingle, jingle, jingle" of Argent the cat's collar as he entered the circle. There were other cats in the household, but Argent was the only one who could make his presence so obviously known without interrupting the ceremony.
Coming out Christian Pagan is difficult, because we face discrimination from both sides. They both react with fear. Even though Pagans are generally more liberal, most of them have had bad experiences with Christians and may feel threatened by someone who's Christian Pagan. My husband has told me that I have opened his mind about Christianity. Unlike many other Christian/Pagan interfaith marriages I know of, our faiths mesh. We have the same basic beliefs, with only a few minor differences in details, and we have different patrons. But I am not adverse to Odin or Freya popping in on me. Before I moved in with Robert, I did some long-distance psychic healing on him. I'd never done healing from a distance before and was terrified I was doing it wrong. Freya gave me some basic advice: "Cast a circle first."
While most of my close friends know my faith, there are some who don't, and my family doesn't. My family still thinks I'm totally Christian. I'm not. There is a good chance they will Google and find this essay. I don't care. I am not ashamed of my beliefs. Christ is my Lord and Bast my Lady. I did not have to leave my faith in Christ and everything I loved about him behind, and I did not have to abandon my Mother. Religion is not an all-or-nothing proposition. The gods are not that close-minded.
H. E. Smith
www.witchvox.com/va/dt_va.html?a=usxx&c=words&id=8180
Author: H. E. Smith
Posted: January 24th. 2004
Times Viewed: 6,438
I am Christian Pagan. While the two faiths seem opposed, this isn't necessarily the case. Both religions are general groups that include many subsects. Baptists aren't the only Christians out there, nor are Wiccans the only Pagans. Historically, Christians and Pagans have been at such odds that it creates the illusion of fundamental contradiction.
I used to believe that illusion myself. I was raised by a semi-conservative family; they ranged between liberalism and conservatism, depending on which books my father was reading at the time. When I was a teenager, my psychic talents started to blossom. I could sense psychic energy, accurately distinguish past happenings from some objects, and I had some precognition.
About this time, things started happening around my household. My parents went through a rough time in their marriage, and it had a negative effect on the energy. I was depressed and throwing myself into religion, even though I didn't go to a church. My father was reading Fundamentalist Christian books at that time, books like He Came To Set the Captives Free by Rebecca Brown and other books on "spiritual warfare."
These books encouraged a misconception that many Christians share -- that all Pagans worship Satan, even if they don't realize it. They went further, accusing Pagans of being demon-possessed, and warned that if a Christian had anything to do with a Pagan without conversion, they could be possessed as well. Scare tactics.
Prior to reading those books, I had no problems with Pagans. I didn't think they were evil; I just thought they were different. A couple of years earlier, I'd read Mercedes Lackey's Diana Tregarde novels and had the premonition that I would marry a Wiccan man, though I discarded that possibility as ridiculous.
After reading the Fundie books, I got scared. I hate to admit that I believed them. I was desperately searching for an explanation for the things that were going wrong in my life. One year, I had eleven cats either run away or die. I dreamed the deaths of five of them. Things would routinely disappear around the house without explanation. For example, one day my father put down a coffee bag on a breadboard. He turned around to talk to me. We both looked back to the breadboard. No coffee. We looked on the floor, in the cupboards, in the freezer, in the garage, in the pantry...everywhere it could possibly be. Still no coffee. Five minutes after giving up, the coffee reappeared on the breadboard. Those books described this as common behavior in households with demons.
Also, at the time, my mother was under extreme stress from the situation with my father. Her actions were so out-of-character for her that I latched onto demon possession as an explanation.
Even then, I didn't totally believe everything the books said. I had a hard time believing that rock music would open someone to demon possession. I also had difficulty believing that all Pagans were possessed. What got to me was -- "What if it's true?" I was scared into it and avoided having anything to do with Pagans, though I was polite enough not to preach.
I lost my mind and came back from it. This is important. If you know someone who gets brainwashed -- don't give up on them. They can come back, but it may take time.
When I was seventeen, I joined an online writer's group and started going to their chat room. After a while, I started talking about religion with one of the guys there, and I remember thinking that he was the most Christian man I'd ever met, in the sense of the way he acted towards others. We agreed on everything we discussed, which surprised me, because this had never happened before. A couple weeks later, he mentioned he was Wiccan.
This freaked me out. I was terrified because of the things I'd read, but this man was nothing like what the books portrayed Pagans as. I prayed and asked God what I should do. I still remember the response: "I brought you here for a reason. Don't be afraid."
Over that summer, I started questioning a lot of what those books said. I did some research online and found The Celtic Connection's great FAQ on Wicca. My jaw dropped when I read it. Nearly everything talked about in that FAQ described my beliefs.
That's when I started questioning my faith, when I started seriously looking at my beliefs. If something didn't make sense, it went out the window. A religion isn't worth following if it doesn't hold up to scrutiny. After thought, I realized that I believed in reincarnation, multiple gods, and that my moral code ran closer to Wiccan/Pagan than conservative Christian.
But none of those beliefs were against Christianity in any way. What Christ said about Heaven in the Gospels could be interpreted as reincarnation. Also, in the Ten Commandments, God says, "Thou shalt not worship any God above me," not "You shall not worship any God but me." It simply means that if you worship that God, you should at least worship him on an equal level with your other gods. On the moral code, many liberal Christians have morals and ethics closer to Paganism than conservative Christianity.
I went through a phase where I called myself "Eclectic Christian" and told people I had Christian, Buddhist, Native American, and Pagan beliefs -- which I did. But I still feared to fully embrace my beliefs. I lived in my parents' house, and I knew if they found out about my beliefs, they wouldn't stop pressuring me. I was underage, and they in effect owned me.
It wasn't until after I left home and moved in with my fiancé -- hilariously enough, the Wiccan man who'd first opened my mind -- that I felt free enough to fully explore my beliefs. One of my housemates is "Pagan with Christ as patron," as he's put it. He is the first other Christian I've met that I agree with when it comes to religion.
Christianity and Paganism are not mutually exclusive. Whether or not Christ was originally a god, that same question applies to many other gods. For example, Odin from the Norse and Quetzalcoatl from the Aztec. That does not make Christ's teachings invalid or him any less a god to those who worship him. I do not believe that you have to accept Christ as Savior in order to be Christian. He never said anything about that; Paul and others after him did. Christ said: "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." (John 14:6, NIV.)
In context, Christ seemed to be talking about actions and the way you treated people, not spiritual codependence. People should be responsible for their own actions, not asking the Divine to take on the role of rescuer while they play victim. However, one Christian told me that I couldn't call myself a Christian because I didn't accept Christ as Savior. I've had others say the same because I didn't agree with their church's dogmas. I believe that the Bible is meant to be interpreted on a person-by-person basis, prayed and meditated on, thought about. Not listening to the Weekly Hatemonger Show on the radio or going to see it live at your local Fundamentalist church and accepting their views as given straight from God. The world is bigger than that.
As time passed, I became more comfortable with my beliefs. One day, when I was walking down the road to the local Tom Thumb, I was meditating on the gods, and I realized that Bast was Goddess to me. I'd said that I honored all the gods and respected them, but never worshipped any other but Christ. But Bast...I had always been fascinated with Bast. I read about her and wrote about her. I never dared worship her before. But she has clearly blessed me; during the years when I was having so much trouble with my family, my cat Owl basically raised me. She was my mamacat.
Also, Bast made her blessing known in a very real way during my handfasting. It took place in the living room because weather did not permit an outdoor event like we'd planned. After she was summoned, everyone could hear the "jingle, jingle, jingle" of Argent the cat's collar as he entered the circle. There were other cats in the household, but Argent was the only one who could make his presence so obviously known without interrupting the ceremony.
Coming out Christian Pagan is difficult, because we face discrimination from both sides. They both react with fear. Even though Pagans are generally more liberal, most of them have had bad experiences with Christians and may feel threatened by someone who's Christian Pagan. My husband has told me that I have opened his mind about Christianity. Unlike many other Christian/Pagan interfaith marriages I know of, our faiths mesh. We have the same basic beliefs, with only a few minor differences in details, and we have different patrons. But I am not adverse to Odin or Freya popping in on me. Before I moved in with Robert, I did some long-distance psychic healing on him. I'd never done healing from a distance before and was terrified I was doing it wrong. Freya gave me some basic advice: "Cast a circle first."
While most of my close friends know my faith, there are some who don't, and my family doesn't. My family still thinks I'm totally Christian. I'm not. There is a good chance they will Google and find this essay. I don't care. I am not ashamed of my beliefs. Christ is my Lord and Bast my Lady. I did not have to leave my faith in Christ and everything I loved about him behind, and I did not have to abandon my Mother. Religion is not an all-or-nothing proposition. The gods are not that close-minded.
H. E. Smith
www.witchvox.com/va/dt_va.html?a=usxx&c=words&id=8180